As a transgender woman, my journey of self-discovery and affirmation has been deeply intertwined with my understanding of sexuality, identity, and autonomy. I identify as a sex-positive transfeminist, which means I believe in celebrating the full range of human experience, embracing sexual expression, and challenging the societal norms that seek to limit or shame it.
Being sex-positive is about more than just being open to diverse sexual orientations and practices. It’s about rejecting the stigma that surrounds certain aspects of sexuality and embracing a philosophy of consent, respect, and autonomy. As a transgender woman, I’ve had to navigate not only societal expectations of femininity and gender but also the layers of shame and misconceptions about my body, my desires, and my identity. Transgender women, in particular, are often stigmatized as either hypersexual or as objects of fetish, but being a sex-positive transfeminist means rejecting these harmful stereotypes and celebrating my sexuality as a multifaceted and natural part of who I am.
Kink-Friendly and Embracing Diverse Sexual Expression
As part of my sex-positive approach, I am also kink-friendly. I believe that kink and BDSM practices, when based on mutual consent, communication, and respect, are just as valid and fulfilling as any other form of sexual expression. In fact, the kink community has provided me with a space to embrace my desires, challenge social taboos, and engage in deep, meaningful exploration of power dynamics and intimacy. Being kink-friendly means acknowledging that people have diverse desires and fantasies, and those desires are valid as long as they are consensual and respectful of everyone involved.
For me, this means fully accepting and celebrating all aspects of my sexuality without shame or guilt. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to sexual expression, and I firmly believe that everyone deserves the freedom to explore their desires in ways that are both safe and affirming.
Writing Erotica: An Outlet for Creative and Sexual Expression
Another important aspect of my life is my work as an erotica writer, which I pursue under a pen name. Through my writing, I’ve been able to explore the complexities of desire, identity, and power dynamics in a way that aligns with my own experiences and fantasies. My work is known within certain communities on the internet, where it has garnered attention for its raw, unapologetic exploration of sex and intimacy. Writing under a pen name allows me to separate my public persona from my private creative expression, but it also gives me the freedom to engage with readers and communities who appreciate erotic literature that pushes boundaries, explores kink, and challenges societal views on sexuality.
The act of writing erotica is, for me, a form of empowerment. It allows me to reclaim my sexuality in a way that is both creative and personal, while also providing an opportunity to engage with others who share similar interests. It’s a space where I can express myself freely, without judgment, and where I can challenge the taboos that often surround topics of sex and desire.
Pro-Sex Worker and Advocacy for Decriminalization
As part of my broader belief in sex-positivity and autonomy, I am also pro-sex worker and firmly believe that prostitution should be decriminalized. Sex work, when practiced consensually and safely, is a valid and legitimate form of labor, and the criminalization of sex work only serves to harm those who engage in it. By decriminalizing prostitution, we can ensure that sex workers have access to legal protections, safety, and healthcare, and can live their lives without the constant fear of legal repercussions or stigmatization.
Transgender people, particularly trans women, are disproportionately affected by the criminalization of sex work. Many transgender individuals face discrimination and marginalization in the job market, leaving sex work as one of the few viable options for survival. By decriminalizing prostitution, we would not only be improving the lives of sex workers, but also dismantling the social stigma and criminalization that disproportionately harms marginalized communities.
Sex workers, like all individuals, deserve to be treated with dignity and respect, free from criminal penalties. It’s time for society to recognize sex work as work, and to protect those who choose this path with the same legal rights and protections afforded to any other worker.
Challenging Stigma and Celebrating Autonomy
As a sex-positive transfeminist, my goal is to create a world where people of all genders, orientations, and identities can embrace their sexualities without fear of judgment or discrimination. I advocate for spaces that are inclusive, respectful, and open to all forms of consensual expression, whether that means engaging in kink, embracing non-traditional relationships, or simply living authentically as one’s true self.
Sexuality is a deeply personal and often transformative aspect of human life. For transgender individuals, it can be an especially challenging terrain to navigate. But by embracing a sex-positive mindset and fostering a transfeminist perspective, I believe we can create more inclusive, affirming spaces for people to explore their identities and desires. It’s not just about personal liberation—it’s about contributing to a broader cultural shift where all people, regardless of gender or background, can live authentically and celebrate their sexuality without shame.
In embracing sex-positivity, kink, erotic writing, and advocacy for sex workers’ rights, I’ve found a sense of freedom and empowerment that has transformed my journey. And I’m proud to share this part of my identity with others, hoping to encourage a more inclusive, respectful, and open-minded world.
Unapologetically Sexual
By Katherine Walter
On May 30, 2025
In LGBTQ+ rights, sexuality
But I am not ashamed. Because when I say something as simple and carnal as “I like to suck dick,” I’m not being obscene—I’m declaring war on the suffocating norms that define who gets to express desire and how.
Let’s be clear: this isn’t just about sex. It’s about power.
The phrase “I like sex” is broadly acceptable when said by a cis, straight man. Even when women say it, it must be delivered with just the right balance of flirtation and modesty, wrapped in acceptable femininity. But when a transgender woman like me speaks directly and honestly about her sexuality—without euphemism, without apology—it’s treated as taboo. It becomes scandalous, political, dangerous.
And that’s exactly why I say it.
Heteronormativity doesn’t just regulate bodies—it polices desire. It dictates what kind of sex is real, what kind of sex is dirty, and which voices are allowed to claim desire at all. Trans women are often reduced to caricatures: hypersexual porn tropes or sexless tokens of pity. To say, plainly and proudly, that I love sucking dick is to reject all of that. It’s to assert my autonomy, my pleasure, and my humanity.
Yes, I am a transgender woman. Yes, I am sexual. And yes, I will speak about it.
My words weren’t unprofessional. They were inconvenient—to a system that still finds trans joy threatening and trans pleasure unspeakable. I lost a role in education for telling the truth about myself. But I gained something else: clarity. I know now that empowerment doesn’t come from fitting in. It comes from taking up space. From naming what you’re told to hide. From loving your body and your voice enough to say what they told you you shouldn’t even feel.
So I will continue to speak freely. Not because I want to provoke—but because I refuse to be erased. I want other trans women to know that they can be intelligent, nurturing, sexual, kinky, loud, soft, and bold—all at once. I want us all to know that our worth doesn’t shrink because someone else is uncomfortable with our truths.
When I say “I like to suck dick,” I’m not just being honest.
I’m being powerful.
And in a world built to silence women like me, that is revolutionary.